If you want to have a long and happy marriage, here are some things you need to consider.
"Pick your battles. And by that, I mean ask yourself, ‘Is this worth sleeping next to a snoring, grudge-holding human space heater tonight?’ If the answer is no, let it go."
"Remember, marriage isn’t 50/50. Some days it’s 90/10, and some days it’s just ‘I didn’t smother him in his sleep, so I’d say we’re doing great.’"
"Communication is key, but selective hearing is a survival skill. Learn both."
"A sense of humor will save you. Because if you can’t laugh when they load the dishwasher like a raccoon on Red Bull, you’re gonna have a rough time."
"Be best friends. Best friends forgive. Best friends share snacks. And best friends occasionally tell each other to shut up without getting a divorce."
"Keep the romance alive. And by romance, I mean don’t let them see you plucking your chin hairs. Some mysteries are best left unsolved."